Fear: Let It Go and Be Brave
I had a really hard time writing this post, but you know how sometimes spilling your guts makes you feel better? I’m hoping this might have the same effect.
Being a retired student for the past month has given me ample time to ponder, break down, build back up, and explore a million things that never graced my mind before. I’ve learned to be a bit more intuitive with my actions, notice beauty in places I never saw it before, and live life at a bit of a slower pace. Being the Type A personality that I am, I never expected to enjoy a day with no plan or schedule. But I am.
Have you ever heard the saying “when the student is ready, the teacher appears“? I’ve been having these moments while reading this book, and when this article popped up in my feed. I am realizing that fear has permeated many facets of my life, and that it is ultimately preventing the natural course that life is supposed to take.
Let me give you an example; a month ago, I was freaked out beyond belief that my life as a student was over. Instead of embracing the change, fear (of stagnancy, failure, boredom, etc.) prevented me from moving on. After many life chats with friends (thanks friends!) I learned to embrace the change and release the fear.
Fearlessness is still a work in practice, I assure you. Another slightly comical example of how fear has seeped in (I swear, most people I have recounted this story too have laughed at my misfortune) happened three weeks ago when I had my first real-person job interview for a nursing job. As much as I tried to embrace the situation, my fear and nervousness couldn’t be suppressed. If an award existed it would have won, ‘The Worst Job Interview of All Time’ award. How bad was it, you ask? Let’s just say I broke down in tears; in the interview!
Oh, but wait; that’s not the funny part! The real knee-slapper is that I got the job. You would think this would call for elation on my part, but instead I became fearful of having to accept a job that I didn’t want to take. Thankfully all the introspection I’ve taken part in over the past month led me to listen to my heart, and I turned down the job.
Oh J.Lo, you speak so much truth. As hard as it is to admit, fear has infiltrated blogging too. Comparison is such an ugly monster, but it is not one I (or most people, I think) are immune to. When I see the beautiful content being published everyday by this amazing community of like-minded people, I fear that I am not good enough, and that I am losing my ability and desire to contribute how I would like to.
So, I am at a bit of an odds. I love blogging, but I am also learning that I love a lot of other things too. I love yoga, and writing, and bike riding, and spending time with friends. Based on my past efforts I am coming to the conclusion that listening to my heart is the thing to do in squashing fear, and this applies to blogging too. I’m resolving to simplify and do what feels right, not what my editorial calendar or ‘blogging for dummies’ tells me to do.
If I didn’t do a good enough job explaining how I feel, Elsa sums it up quite well.
No questions, but I would love to hear your thoughts.
Get your veggy on: